Refined Cat?

I saw this video at cuteoverload…

Gee, this cat is way better than me in using a fork and chopsticks to eat!!! Coolness!

Light Pollution

I’ve always thought I never see the stars in this part of the world. One night, as I was doing my laundry, I went out to the “rooftop” of our building and looked at the cloudless sky. Wow, I saw the stars but, they are very very faint? Why? I told this to a friend and asked why. The friend suggested it may be due to light pollution. There’s too much light in the city, probably making the sky bright and the stars faint. Ok, but how about the stars above the lake? It’s pitch black out there but I still couldn’t see the stars? Could it still be part of the effect of light pollution? Who knows?

Oh yeah, I changed the image header in my blog. I thought it would be more appropriate. Don’t you think so? Hehehe…

Mamma Mia!

Here I go again, my, my how can I resist you???

I’ve finally seen the movie version. It was way better than the live musical I’ve seen in Detroit three years ago. That’s why when the movie went out, I wasn’t that enthusiastic to see it. But my mom gave a good feedback (i.e. gorgeous Pierce Brosnan and beautiful Greek Isles). Finally I saw it today and it made me really happy. The cast was great as well. I liked Amanda Seyfried (?)’s voice very much especially when she sang the bonus track “Thank you for the music”. It’s cutesy but i liked it a lot. I also found Meryl Streep and her two girlfriends extremely entertaining. And the men… wow, I enjoyed seeing and hearing them sing, coolness. And the younger men.., ooh lala… i guess i should visit the greek isles… wink wink… hehehe… Anyway, if you haven’t seen this movie yet, go ahead, treat yourself. Have some fun.

Pablo Neruda Night

I’m feeling senti tonight. I don’t know, it must be the hormones. Anyway, almost everybody I know who knows Pablo Neruda loves his work. I became a fan when someone I really liked texted me some lines from his poems.

Here’s the very first Senor Pablo’s poem I fell in love with….

Don’t Go Far Off

Don’t Go Far Off

Don’t go far off, not even for a day, because –

because -- I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.
 
Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.
 
Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,
 
because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?
                -- Pablo Neruda

I never claim to be good with poetry. Most often than not, I do not understand them. Sometimes I find them touching my heart, but still not understand them. Even if it’s easily understandable to a lot of people. Either my brain or my emotional development is too slow… Either way, at least I’m glad I’m starting to understand some of the great writings…

Here are other two of his poems that I sort of appreciated just recently…

If You Forget Me by Pablo Neruda

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine

Tonight I Can Write by Pablo Neruda

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, ‘The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.’

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that’s certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another’s. She will be another’s. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that’s certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

Definitely? Maybe!

I never thought I’d like a Ryan Reynolds movie. I may have seen some before, but they were just ho-hum. Tonight I finally watched the movie Definitely, Maybe. It’s an interesting “narration” of someone’s love story. As usual, my guess isn’t right about who the mom was, but I kinda hit on the bull’s eye with the true love kinda thing.

I felt it’s kind of like patterned to When Harry Met Sally. The love story developed throughout the years and it’s the kind of love story i like… about two friends, who may have some attraction, but they don’t really take it seriously. They enjoy being with each other, they can talk about anything (so important!), however, they don’t realize they are meant for each other. But in time they realize it, however, it’s never the right moment until they hurt each other and it’s too late. But love has a way of playing a trick on them, they find each other eventually, and their story begins again. Sigh…

There’s a particular “quote” I kinda liked from the story. Something from the book Jane Eyre (as if I read it!) by Charlotte Bronte:

The human heart has hidden treasures
In secret kept, in silence sealed
The thoughts, the hopes, the dreams, the pleasures,
Whose charms were broken if revealed.

I think it’s confirmed. I don’t think I’m capable of actually loving someone, romantically. I just don’t know. I long for it for so long, when I know I won’t be loved, I would fall so hard. But when I am aware that there may actually be a chance for something two-way, I pull away. Or do I have to wait ’til I get much much older (gosh, how old should i be???) for me to learn. I don’t know.

Well, I hope everyone has a great weekend.

Techie update

Been quiet these past weeks. A lot has happened but it did not involve BBS. By the way, I’ve given up on him already. Now, we’re kinda back to that awkward stage. I guess I still have a little crush on him, and would welcome any attention, but I like another now, and I GUESS that other person likes me back.

On a lighter note, I’ve been bored with my desktop computer, but it is still functioning well for me to replace it with a super powerful (not to mention, cheaper and lighter) laptop. Then one day I went window shopping at Best Buy and saw a bunch of really small laptops. Fast forward to yesterday, I searched online for those small laptops, and man, I fell in love with them. Not to mention, some of them are really cheap!! Less than $500! 

Well it looks like they are called Netbooks, UMPC, among other things. I think I like the 10″ screen way better than the smaller 7″. But one complain I have while perusing these babies, is that the specs are low, come on 512 MB to 1 GB memory, and some even have <10GB hard drive! Can you believe that! But I read the fine line, those less powerful machines, I found out, ran on linux OS which does not need much space to properly run in your pc. In addition, applications are available for free, and may be compatible with the M$ office apps. One of the GNU distro (feeling techie, tama ba naman ang ginagamit kong term? h-m-m…) that caught my attention was Ubuntu. I have no technical knowledge on how to assess this stuff but all I can say is that it looks cool and promising, and I’m extremely curious to try this out. I am a bit hesitant though to try this on my working desktop but they say that you can try it without distrupting your PC. But what I really want to do is try this on a Netbook or something… Yeah yeah, this is just my justification to spend moolah.

Speaking of trying it on netbooks, I’ve looked around and found some interesting babies. Here are some of the babes I found: Lenovo IdeaPad S10, HP 2133, ASUS EEEPC 901, MSI Wind Notebook, Sylvania g Netbook MAGNI, and whatever netbook that will comeout with Ubuntu. But right now I’m more inclined to get the Lenovo one, which will come out in October. Hmmm… a good birthday present, doncha think? But I guess I should wait til the thanksgiving sale, it’s just a couple of months from now. I’m sure the prices of these will go down next year (I’m certain of that) and newer, sassier versions will come out. Don’t they all?

Anyway, all I can do now is research research research. And check out how Ubuntu works. Besides, nothing good really comes out from impulsive buying. I’ll just have to save and wait for Black Friday to get one of these. Oh…. I can’t wait. Good there’s something to look forward to. In the meantime, ipon muna!

Praise You

This is one of my favorite songs, videos, and choreography. It occured to me while re-watching this video that these guys are like a bunch of statisticians performing at a statistical conference like the Joint Statistical Meetings (timely, eh?). A bunch of extremely smart people but don’t be deceived… they’re not only smart and technical, but they’re also artistic and creative. Hah, you’d think that left brained people don’t have any artistic blood flowing in their veins… you’re wrong… Wha-wha-wha? Am I having a monologue here? Geez… Sorry, just extremely bored this afternoon. Hope you enjoy this as much as I do.

beyond repair

Part I (As written on 06/11/2008)

Ever since i got broken, i’ve been hiding away in a dark store room. Trying to blind my sight so I won’t see images of you. Drowned myself in silence, so I won’t hear your voice. Kept myself in the cold, so I won’t remember your warmth. I’ve voided myself of any emotions so nothing about you could touch me ever more. Through time I healed. Each torn piece was mended and connected by scars. Then I see light. Some hope maybe waiting there for me. I gathered my strength to see where it’s coming from, what’s in store for me. When I finally dragged myself to the now opened window, I see how wonderful it is outside. I hear the laughter of happiness, the beauty of it all, I was so inspired to go outside. I was excited. I poured my strength to unbar the door. It was difficult, as if something was preventing me from opening it. But my enthusiasm did not falter. I managed to successfuly open it. At last, the light shined on me brightly, I had to cover my eyes. The beautiful world I longed for, is so near, yet I had doubts. I’ve been cloistered for so long I didn’t know what to expect. I didn’t know what to do. I was drenched by the light of the sun, so warm, so inviting. I could live this. Then I saw you, you looked through me as if you didn’t know me. Then the others looked as well. I turned to look at myself and found how different I have become. The few moments of hesitation I took were enough for the doubts to grow. For the darkness to loom again. I took a step back and looked once more before I withdrew and closed the door.

Part II

But little did I know that you recognized me. I did not notice you smile while approaching, ready to welcome me. I was blinded by my fear, by my insecurities. You knocked at my door, but I forced myself not to listen. I heard you call, but it did not register. I thought you did not want me. I was afraid to wrong you, to disappoint you.

Try as I may to ignore, I really knew you were there, ready to welcome me. Ready to take care of me. You come without judgment just acceptance and understanding. But I was stubborn. I wasn’t willing to believe that anyone could accept me, that anyone could love me. I always have the what ifs in my mind. I didn’t want to get hurt but in the process of avoiding it I get hurt even more, plus… I hurt you. But even then, I let my stubbornness prevail. I let my heart become hard and grow cold. Every tear I shed, I feel the pain and lose it. The more tears I shed, the harder and colder my heart gets. I may have loved you…no I love you, but not enough to let you into my life.

“If you come to my cube, i can walk you through what I’m thinking.”

So, our paths meet again. The big boss assigned me to work on some deliverables due next week. However, one of those output, you created already and you hold the key to a lot of information I need.

Anyway, we had a meeting with the big boss today regarding another project. After the meeting, you asked a question about the new task and I stayed wanting to hear what big boss had to say. We stayed a couple of minutes more to talk about it. Then we went back at the office together still talking about it. It looks like you are getting more and more comfortable talking to me, that is good. I also noticed I don’t feel flustered talking to you anymore, nor do I feel nervous, I just try to be calm and cheerful (parang naka hit hit… hehehe) around you. Then you emailed me the stuff I asked from you, then I replied asking you where your program and other files are so I can just work off from there. Then you sent the link to where the files are and wrote that reply… “If you come to my cube, I can walk you through what I’m thinking.” That’s a very, very tempting invitation. LOL… hahahaha… So I surprised you by popping in front of you (I used the short cut to reach your cube). You offered me that multi purpose seat. At first I was just standing and wasn’t really expecting the conversation to be long, but I guess I should know you by now. You just looooveee explaining things, which I don’t mind since I learn a lot from them. You walked me through your program, to the files and all. It took us about over 30 mins discussing this. I also noticed you really maintain eye contact when you talk to people. You kept looking even though I remove my gaze from you. Hehe…

Oh I noticed something about your beard, somewhere on your chin, there’s like a patch of exposed skin, what happened there? Did someone wax that part of your chin while you were wasted? LOL… I wanted to ask you but I felt I might be trespassing your personal life. Anyway, I hope the hair grow back soon. ;p

A Semi Quiet Weekend

To be honest I didn’t want to write anything these past days. I had been having “boy problems” but I do not wish to dwell on this matter. My heart and mind have been in shambles, of course I’m just exaggerating. Let us just say, yes, there is another party other than BBS. But I do not wish to discuss him any further, as it took so much strength to regain my sanity.

Some BBS update

It was another “flying fiesta” ride, roller coaster is so cliche, with BBS. We’ve taken the train together this week, first he followed me (again), but the day after that he went into the other car. And in the succeeding days, he left later than I did. Nothing really interesting, more like annoying incidences with him until about 4:45 pm on Friday. I was coming back from the restroom, when I was entering my cube, I was greeted by the sight of BBS over the bakod on my cube, looking intently at me. My eyes widened in surprise as I acknowledged him. Then he began to speak. He said, he had a stupid question for me (and I thought he was going to ask me out.). He asked if I use Office 2007 and that he couldn’t find the print preview button. I said I could help him and went to his cube. As i was giving suggestions, he followed them, but explained what those were as he whined. Finally he was able to find the button. Was he trying to be a fuzzy knight in distress? I dunno. Anyway, he never said thank you, and I couldn’t bid him a nice weekend.

Book

I had been quite “morose” (Dead Poets!) this week and I wanted to have some senti moments. I was looking for “sad” books to read. I chanced upon this coming-of-age like book called “The Perks of Being a Wallflower” by Stephen Chbosky. (The lady at Borders smiled when she was ringing the book…) . Anyway, it’s a book “about growing up” as written by this main character in his letters to someone. It’s a very easy read, indeed very touching. I would like to say I can relate to him but in so many ways it reminded me of the person whom I don’t want to remember much this week. Anyway, I haven’t really finished the book yet, I’m savoring each and every letter Charlie (the main character’s name) wrote. The thing is, even if I cannot relate to him, I can sort of feel the things he has been going through. It’s really a good read. My next project is Namesake. I just want to cleanse my system from the fantasy genre. But fear not, i’ll still go back to finish that damned feast for the crows. LOL

Movie afternoons

I finally got to watch the two movies sitting on my dvd player for at least 2 weeks now. Yesterday I watched National Treasures Book of Secrets. It was fun, I enjoyed it a lot. Glad I borrowed and WATCHED it.

Oh before the next movie, I watched the Gay Pride Parade today. It was fun, lots of hunky gay bodies. Lovely. Though I didn’t finish it since it started raining and I was hungry and my feet were starting to swell. When i got home, I watched Stardust. Yes, I finally watched it and I’m so glad I did. It was a very good (and somewhat funny) movie. Though I did not see the need to utilize all those “famous” celebs. But what got me the most was the song that was playing towards the end. I eventually learned it’s called Rule the World by Take That. I’m not sure if that’s original Take That or Take That reunited. In any case, I’ll have to admit they’re good — collectively (I’m not particularly fond of Gary Barlow as a solo artist, though Robbie Williams is just fine).

Anyway, here’s a video of the song. I would just like to share it since it made me feel “infinite”.

 

You light the skies, up above me
A star, so bright, you blind me, yeah
Don’t close your eyes
Don’t fade away, don’t fade away-

Oh

Yeah you and me we can ride on a star
If you stay with me girl
We can rule the world-
Yeah you and me we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world-

If walls break down, I will comfort you
If angels cry, oh I’ll be there for you
You’ve saved my soul
Don’t leave me now, don’t leave me now

Oh

Yeah you and me we can ride on a star
If you stay with me girl
We can rule the world
Yeah you and me, we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world-

Ooooooooh
All the stars are coming out tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you, for you
All the stars are coming out tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you, for you-

Ooooooooh

Yeah you and me we can ride on a star
If you stay with me girl
We can rule the world
Yeah you and me, we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world

All the stars are coming out tonight (oooooooh)
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you, for you-
All the stars are coming out tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you,for you-

All the stars, are coming out tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you, for you-
All the stars, are coming out tonight
They’re lighting up the sky tonight
For you,for you-

lyrics from ALLYRICS.NET